Machete

Machete is a pretty good companion to The Expendables, another bloody ensemble action film that came out in the late summer of last year. It's a little more low budget and skews a bit differently with its cast, featuring more well-known women than men and a bunch of character actors. They both have their strengths and weaknesses, and I hesitate to declare one or the other the truly superior film, but they're both mostly enjoyable, hilariously violent movies.

The movie stars the instantly-recognizable Danny Trejo as Machete, a Mexican federal who gets betrayed, crosses the border, and gets betrayed again, when he decides to finally fight back against all those who have wronged him. It's a pretty extensive list, including Jeff Fahey as a slimy businessman and Steven Seagal as a slimy ex-federal. Robert De Niro plays a slimy politician with a fake Texan accent, in one of the more obvious jabs in a movie full of easy commentary on the whole immigration issue. I didn't bother trying to really understand what the movie was trying to say, because it was clear from the beginning that the real purpose of Machete was to be a silly Mexploitation film, and the politics are just there so a bunch of Mexican people can make speeches and then fight a bunch of white people. Basically, our economy needs cheap illegal labor to run, and if you try to totally get rid of it, bad things will happen. In real life, people would lose money; in the movie, they might get shot or blown up.

But anyway Machete joins an underground criminal network in an attempt to get back at the many villains the film quickly introduces. To sum it up simply, much like Once Upon a Time In Mexico, the plot is kind of an overstuffed mess. There are too many characters who don't have enough to do and the movie doesn't take enough time to make them all worth the effort. Luckily, unlike Mexico, Machete mostly makes up for it by generally acknowledging its own silliness and letting the fun come from a bunch of silly one-liners and especially absurdly gory and occasionally honestly clever action scenes. There's also some pointless nudity and winking celebrity cameos, this movie did come out of the whole Grindhouse project after all. Rodriguez has proven himself pretty consistent at making entertaining low-brow movies on the cheap, and he did the same thing again here. Things kind of peter out once you realize there's no way he's going to resolve everything in a unique and satisfactory way, but if you just let it be a stupid action movie with a lot of mediocre-to-good ideas, it's not bad.

Con Air

I still don't really understand Nick Cage. He can be a really good actor when he wants to, but he seems to want to less and less these days. He'll pretty much be in any movie as long as he gets the lead role. Which is why he's here in Con Air, bulked up to hell and back and putting on one of the worst accents I've ever heard. Cage trying to sound southern is just... just an abomination of acting. For some reason though, it works with the rest of the movie. He's surrounded by colorful characters, and if the protagonist was taken too seriously, I don't think the film would be as enjoyable as it is. It's not perfect, but for what it is it works pretty well.

It's one of those slightly older big action movies that at least tries to have an interesting and clever plot - you know, something Hollywood doesn't really try anymore. So Cage is a military veteran who comes home from the service to his pregnant wife, only to kill a man while defending her that night. Because his training has made him a deadly weapon, they throw the book at him and give him 7-10 years for manslaughter. Way to support the troops, legal system. Anyway, at the end of his sentence, he is to be transported by plane to a location for release. Unfortunately there are a bunch of bad dudes on that plane and they manage to take it over, causing a hostage situation in the skies. The revolt is lead by an enjoyably evil John Malkovich, and he's got everyone from a black militant Ving Rhames to a serial rapist Danny Trejo helping him out. John Cusack is in charge of the plane on the ground and is trying to stop it, but he's antagonized at every turn by Colm Meaney as a DEA official pissed that one of his guys got killed, so it's more or less up to Cage to save the day while maintaining his cover as just another bad guy. Also, Steve Buscemi is a serial killer.

So there's a lot of menacing dialogue and somewhat interesting tricks to try to avoid the authorities, and some goofy one-liners from Cage as he sows discord and takes out anyone who might stop him. The plane itself is a major location, but there's also some fun to be had at an abandoned airfield and eventually in the middle of the Vegas strip. People shoot guns and beat each other up and things explode all pretty. There's quite a few holes in the script, but it's fairly solid for this kind of action movie, and it can certainly be a fun time if you don't take it too seriously. I still just don't understand how an Oscar winning actor could butcher an accent so completely. Or how it's wrong for a vet to defend his wife with deadly force but not to chase someone all around Las Vegas with murderous intent. Oh well. Pretty good.

Predators

It's pretty clear with this film that producer Robert Rodriguez and director Nimród Antal set out to do two things. The first was to pay tribute to one of the best action movies of the 80s. The second was to be the only film since the original featuring the titular antagonists to actually be entertaining. It mostly succeeded on both fronts. It's not a great movie, and it honestly handcuffs itself quite a bit by adhering so steadfastly to the story beats set in place by Predator, but it does succeed by combining science fiction, action, and a bit of horror in a similar way. There's nothing terribly original or surprising about the movie, but it has a few likable characters, some brutal and exciting action scenes, and some solid fan service without overdoing it.

There have been comparisons made between Predators and Aliens, both sequels to classic monster movies that up the stakes, which is obviously something they were going for. That's pretty much where the similarities end for me, though. It points to the difference between truly great sequels and merely solidly entertaining ones like this. Anything Predators and Aliens have in common is something that the Predator already did, excepting multiple antagonists. Aliens changed the game by following up a tense, claustrophobic thriller with bombastic large scale action, while Predators just copies Predator with more blood and special effects. It's an approach that works well enough, but it makes any parallels with superior movies seem hollow.

Anyway, the movie itself. It kicks off with a bang as the heroes are forcefully introduced to the wilderness and continues in a fairly wonderful slow burn as they try to figure out where they are and why they were picked. The danger ratchets up slowly, before they eventually discover what they're really up against, and after a slight detour involving a pretty great scene of exposition where everything is laid out by a wonderfully unhinged Laurence Fishburne, it starts to get really violent. I don't think the balls-out violence of the second half is as effective as the slow burn of the first, but I guess I went to see the movie for some Predator violence after all, so I can't complain that much. The mix of characters adds some fun and humor to what could have been a pretty flat script, and Adrien Brody somehow pulls off the gruff loner act without looking like a fool. That was key, because while he's no Dutch, he does manage to keep the movie going as the tough hero, something I wasn't really expecting to see him do quite so well. A lot of the cast is recognizable, including Rodriguez' cousin Danny Trejo as an early victim, Topher Grace as a doctor who doesn't seem to belong, and Walton Goggins from The Shield as a version of his completely trashy persona that's on the wrong side of the law this time.

So anyway, the gang of survivors gets slowly whittled down over time by their hunters, before the telegraphed climactic conclusion where the shirts come off in favor of mud as the humans make their last stand. It's a pretty predictable movie, which is one of the reasons its reliance on reminding you of why Predator was awesome makes for a slightly less impressive final product. Maybe that was necessary though, because the other movies with predators in them tried to take them to difference places or situations and it just didn't work out. It's interesting how the film makes it clear that it's in the same universe as the original, yet completely ignores anything else that may or may not have happened. It seems like a genuine attempt to make the series relevant again after the pandering yet generally terrible crossovers with that other alien series, and I'd be interested in seeing more of what they can do even if the conclusion and ending weren't nearly as strong as the beginning. There were some issues with the foundation of the premise and a few odd directorial choices here and there, but it was mostly a fun time at the movies.