24 - Season 8

Unfortunately, 24's 8th season couldn't reverse the trend of the last couple, bringing the series to a disappointing end. The plot was a string of nonsense and tricks the show has already played before, and when you've killed almost every interesting character and fail to create any new ones, you're flirting with disaster. Seriously, without Jack Bauer, this would have been a total train wreck. And with him, it's merely pretty bad.

I wonder for how long the writers knew this was the end of the show. If you guess that they knew before we did, then you might think that the last third of the season was actually going somewhere interesting, because it shows Jack spiraling out of control in a pit of despair and revenge, which could easily culminate with him and a dozen hours lying dead in a pool of blood. Go out with a bang, you know? But they chicken out, and it ends the same way every other season seemed to end. Nothing new to see, nothing they can't write themselves out of despite how crazy he seemed to go near the end there.

The show pretends to have balls but it really doesn't. They pull the same tricks repeatedly and expect us to still care and be surprised. Wait, you're saying that you picked a good guy out of a hat to secretly have been a mole the whole time? Hold on, the bad guys for the first 15 hours were actually being assisted by someone higher up, who doesn't want people to know about it? I mean... okay, spoilers but no one cares, Katee Sackhoff from Battlestar Galactica is a mole. A hardened double agent looking for a paycheck, doesn't care who gets hurt. So... why does she let herself get pushed around and intimidated by a small time crook ex-boyfriend for the first half of the season? Because the writers just make shit up and don't care if it makes no sense in retrospect.

I don't even care how everyone seems to be able to drive across a major city in the span of a commercial break. You have to make a couple concessions for the show's admittedly interesting real time conceit to work. But when you can pick apart pretty much everything that happens it gets sad. So, this sniper is supposed to kill Jack and his lady friend. Why does he wait until they're done having sex and Jack leaves the room to shoot at them? Sure makes the job a lot harder. Would have been a piece of cake when they were still in the bed. Bad move dude. Now Jack's going to torture you to death in a few hours. How did a car manage to get out of a parking garage with a bad guy in the trunk when both exits were being watched by armed agents? What, as soon as that car went off the roof you just cleared the perimeter? Seems like bad procedure.

And why is Russia so significant? The main plot in the season is about a peace treaty between a fictional Islamic country and the Western world, and for some reason, the Russians are absolutely essential to the process. Without them at the table, the deal won't work. Uh... what? Did the fall of the USSR not happen in this universe and no one told me? Russia's what, the fourth biggest power on the planet now? And they don't want this treaty anyway, for some reason never explained. They orchestrated the terror attacks to prevent it from happening, and the President finds out about this, and STILL WANTS TO GO THROUGH WITH THE TREATY AT ANY COST KNOWING THAT IT'S MEANINGLESS BECAUSE THE RUSSIANS ARE BEING BLACKMAILED INTO SIGNING. How in the hell will this accomplish anything? I... I just... it's sad. We deserve better than this. If they do end up making a movie, I might see it, but I sure won't pay money.

Television Update 4: Straight-to-DVD Finales

A few shows that have recently ended or been in danger of ending have seen episodes or even feature length movies be put out on home video instead of the airwaves, at least in the USA. Here's what I think of them.

Battlestar Galactica: The Plan


Edward James Olmos, who directed this movie, claims it won't be the end of the Galactica saga, and he's not talking about Caprica. In any case, it felt less like a real film and more like a very long, somewhat informative filler episode, giving a lot of background on what was happening with the Cylons in secret in the beginning of the war, within the context of what we know from the end of the series. Cavill and Simon have the biggest roles, with the former orchestrating nearly every move made within the walls of Galactica in the first couple seasons, and the latter having a genuinely intriguing character arc, adding some purpose to a model which was hardly used at all during the regular run of the show. The new footage is heavily interspersed with clips from earlier episodes, although the new perspective was enough to prevent it from feeling like a recap show to me. Not great really, but had some interesting nuggets.

Dollhouse - "Epitaph One"


Because of filming two pilots, the season order got a little screwy for Dollhouse's first season. Only the first twelve regular episodes ending up airing in America, with an extra thirteenth filmed cheaply and shoved onto the DVD. Epitaph One could have been the last episode of the series until it was somehow picked up for a second season, and it jumps into the show's future, showing an apocalyptic world torn apart by the organization's apparent poor business practices. It's pretty fascinating, though it will probably end up becoming frustrating when the show eventually does get canned before the plot can really get this far along. Despite some real clunker episodes, it's brilliant, original science fiction like this that makes the show worth watching every week, although unfortunately there won't be another new episode until December.

Prison Break: The Final Break


I believe this was originally intended to be the show's final two episodes, but they ended up packaging them together into a separate movie, which honestly feels like the right decision. It just doesn't really jive with a series ending, feeling more like a little bonus adventure that's not really relevant to the story arc. I guess it really is the ending anyway, but oh well. It features one last jail break, this time from a women's penitentiary. It fills in some details missing from the ending montage in the series' final episode, and provides an adequately tense and interesting story, although it seems weird that they are able to get in so quickly after the series' other two breaks both took at least a dozen hours of television to pull off. Prison Break was always a second tier series to me, and this does little to change that, but has a nice send-off for the characters.

Battlestar Galactica - Season 4

After a season which some fans thought had too many one-off episodes, the fourth and final pretty much told a continuous story of the ship and its crew's last days as they searched for Earth and an end to the conflict with the Cylons. Thanks to that damned writers' strike there was over half a year of waiting in between the first and second halves, which makes my memory of what happened earlier pretty fuzzy, though I remember being entertained by it all at roughly the same slightly diminished level as season three. There's not a lot of action these days, with large dogfights in space kept to a minimum, though there's still plenty of tension and drama.

I guess the movie Razor was part of this production cycle? It was all right. The Face of the Enemy webisodes were pretty blah, though important for Gaeta's character.

The second half of the season proper was even talkier than the first, although it kept me interested with moments of tension, surprise, and the joy of finally seeing threads created long ago brought to their conclusion. A two part mutiny story was one of the most intense couple hours of television I've seen, and what they do with Starbuck through the whole thing is equal parts baffling and incredible. Most of the rest of it was not quite thrilling, but peppered with enough interesting nuggets to easily keep me going towards the finale, which seems to be dividing the fanbase but I found pretty enjoyable. After a nice setup and pretty exciting battle fought across multiple scenes and scales, there's a nice, long period of wrap-up as the strange quasi-religious imagery that has permeated the series finally sees some resolution and the characters all see their stories end in a mostly satisfying way. There's a couple "what the hell?"s along the way and the final scene was a strange way to make sure the viewer got the message that I thought was obvious, but in the end I was satisfied with it as the ending to a great part of science fiction history.

Battlestar Galactica - Season 3

I felt that the third season of one of the better shows on television was a bit of a step back, but it was still successful for the most part. The main problem was the descent of the mood. Battlestar has always been a bit heavier and more realistic than most science fiction, but it's always had a more playful side, with intriguing human interactions and big space battles. The large Cylon fleets are absent for most of this season, as a lot of the conflict comes from within; more supply problems, unhappy workers, and the trial of Gaius Baltar. The relationships shift from simply interesting to more depressingly melodramatic, and in general the mood of the show is just much bleaker.

Despite the stylistic shift, it's still a good show. While New Caprica was more of a small arc than a complete change in the way the series works, it was still very well done and had rippling effects throughout the season. A lot of characters faced major changes, and they definitely don't go without casualties. They really go deep with a few characters, and by this point they're some of the best there are. Starbuck's constant mind changes can get annoying, but her story is great and where it will go after that finale has me already waiting for the final season's premiere in a couple months.

Battlestar Galactica - Season 2

The second season of Battlestar Galactica falls right into stride with the first season, providing entertaining and often exciting space-based drama and action. The show's greatest success might be how convincingly it pulls of the setting without it ever seeming cheesy. It's just a matter of fact. They strike a good balance between the battles against Cylon and the other troubles the fleet faces like resource troubles and political backstabbing, and romance is a much bigger part this season, and it's handled with a little less awkwardness than a lot of shows seem to end up with.

The special effects are always great, but the show's most interesting aspect is the plot, which always manages to add some new wrinkles when you don't expect it. I always seem to prefer shows that allow the status quo to change wildly without trying to keep everything the same all the time, and the show isn't afraid to skip forward in time or kill off some characters. The discovery of another Battlestar makes tides through the fleet, and the shift as we realize humans don't always see eye to eye is very nice. The political workings near the end lead to the show being turned on its ear unexpectedly in the finale, and I greatly look forward to jumping right into season three and seeing how this will turn out.

Battlestar Galactica - Season 1

I never saw the original series, so I can't say how much the new version owes to it or even how much of the plot is the same. All I can say is that what Battlestar Galactica is is one of the most visually impressive and interesting shows on television. Briefly, 40 years earlier, robots called Cylons, created by the humans of the Twelve Colonies of Kobol, rebel and start a war, eventually being pushed back. During the miniseries which kicks off the show, the Cylons use new models that look and act exactly like humans to infiltrate human society and create an opening, allowing them to land a devastating blow, wiping out the vast majority of civilization and the military. Only one battleship, the Galactica, and about 50,000 humans survive. The attack was so effective that the Secretary of Education, 43rd in line of succession, has to become president.

The first season of the show focuses on the large scale space battles, delicate subterfuge, and complicated personal relationships involving the remaining humans. Anyone could be a Cylon, and some don't even know it, leading to a great sense of mystery and suspense. Evil robots aren't the only problem either, the setting is taken seriously, and the crew has to worry about fuel, water, and ammunition in addition to the constant threat of discovery as they search for Earth, the fabled thirteenth colony. Not even all the humans can stick together, as they're suspicious of each others' true natures and an old terrorist (or freedom fighter as some would call him) has a distressing amount of loyalty among some of the survivors. The core cast of characters is quite strong, and it's interesting to note how important women are in a male dominated sort of entertainment. The president and best pilot in the fleet are women, and the two most prominent of human-looking Cylons are two. There are multiple copies of each model, each with their own consciousness, and of those is currently locked inside the mind of one of the humans, and it's very interesting to see how she helps him and wonder where her allegiances really are. The end of the season is quite the cliffhanger, and I'm ready to jump into the second.